Merry Christmas from the Myers’ 2022
Looked at the list of happenings this year and didn’t spark anything funny so let’s just look at facts:
Odin works with his rubber at Les Schwab and continues fixing his car and truck like a full on mechanic. Sure, I understand that you shouldn’t have to ‘continue’ fixing something if you did it right, but he likes to modify things and he’s very bright. Impressive what he can tackle and resolve, very proud.
Cyrus is working for Legacy Group which is a company that services cell towers… So you know he’s going to be sterile, but he is available ladies! He doesn’t have a fear of heights but he is afraid of me, go figure. He’s growing up to be an outstanding young man, respectful, and loved. So proud of what he’s becoming.
Drake is in 11th grade and going to TCC with Running Start to get his AA when he graduates from HS next year. Acronyms are the new Hieroglyphics. He’s a lifeguard for Peninsula School District and likes gaming and Airsoft. Assuming he keeps his eyeballs intact, he’ll continue to be funny and make us laugh every day. Although, he’s probably got jokes that involve impacted eyeballs… Hmm, I’ll go ask. Proud of this one, too.
Gwen still does that medical billing stuff so you know she’s part of the problem. There’s nobody I want to spend my time with more than her and it’s because of my FOMO. She’s always going to say or do something that I don’t want to miss. She still runs the entire show over here and it’s one helluva show! Remember that sick feeling you have in your stomach when you’re in love? It’s how I feel every day and I love it (except Wednesdays… You know, taco Tuesday, makes that stomach feel ‘different’). You’ve all been around her, you know, you get it. You also know me, you know what I look like, you know what I do and say- eventually I rub everybody the wrong way… and I completely agree, “Lucky sumbitch, she could do better and should probably start looking.” But in my defense, I do make her laugh, clothed or not, and her heart is essentially trapped and she can’t quit me – that, and she’s tethered in the house.
We traveled more this year, Disneyland, New Orleans, Cabo, Las Vegas. We dropped a ton of useless weight and we also now own Rehab all by ourselves. Speaking of getting happy and healthy; our doctors priced us out of personal healthcare by establishing a monthly retainer fee. They want us to pay $35/month/pp just to have them available to us, regardless of whether we use their services. I can get someone to give me a prostate exam for less than $35/month (note: not currently looking, no calls please). Then our dentist fired us because our insurance was paying the bills like your scared girlfriend without a cycle: late. I stopped oral hygiene just to show them what they’re missing. New dentist is, … scared I guess? As a joke, 20 minutes prior to my first cleaning I ate Corn Nuts and ‘speed-brushed’ Oh, the smell, and all the bits. I like to set the precedent so all the other cleanings are so much faster. You’re welcome.
Here’s to wishing you all the happiness and joy this holiday season and all the other seasons. ‘Ting!
Find the funny in everything and exploit it. Laugh at each other and yourself. Smile. Share your secrets so they aren’t secrets any more (except things like, ‘where you hid the body’ or ‘I know a great drug guy’ – keep those for you).
Merry Christmas, Happy New Year
No comments:
Post a Comment